Some Archaeology


SNL has now become the voice of conscience and sanity for many Americans. Of course, its messages have no official imprimatur, and, luckily for the fun of the inventors, it has no checks on its balance. After a killingly funny parody of the White House spokesman last week, I knew some of it sounded familiar.

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Linear Thinking

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It’s a well known fact that 64.7 percent of American physicians spend late August on Martha’s Vineyard, and deserve to. You knew that, but may not know that this year, the percentage unexplainably reached a record 82.4 percent, causing increased pressure on the island’s fragile ecosystem and referring added weight to the ocean floor.

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Kindly Explain This

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Maybe you’ve heard that there is student debt in the United States. Intellectuals say there may be a political solution to this. Yes, and Saturn’s moon Titan may have life that breathes nitrogen instead of oxygen. It’s possible.

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Why I Learned French

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Nineteen sixty-four, and I was flunking French. I don’t mean “doing badly,” but as in, getting straight Fs. The first assignment that freshman year was to read 70 pages of Le Rouge et le Noir of Stendhal, and to do it within 48 hours. They might as well have put me in an advanced Indonesian, for the preparation I had.

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